Beware the Seattle Introvert

There are those who believe that the Seattle Freeze is simply a bi-product of Seattle having a higher percentage of introverts than other large metropolitan cities.  Ok.

Well, for what it’s worth, in my journey of getting to know my neighbors better I have found that regardless of introvert or extrovert, people (neighbors) enjoy connecting. True, they all may not need or want as much connection as myself (an extroverted extrovert), but this past year I have not only INVITED neighbors over for dinner (who tell me they are more introverted), but I have also been INVITED TO THEIR HOMES for dinner.  So there.

Autumn in Seattle is a great time to host a block party.

In two weeks, April 29, it will be one year since I “Declared War On The Seattle Freeze.”  In two weeks I’ll unpack what I did, what I learned and where I go from here.  Until then, I thought I’d celebrate my introvert friends by sharing some fun insights I came across from another blog called “Introvert, Dear.”  Blogger Jenn Granneman shares her “9 Rules For Being Friends With An Introvert” in this whimsical (yet truthful) blog post about what she needs her friends to know if they want to enjoy a friendship with her.

And, I  have to say, after my neighborhood book club recently read and discussed the book “Quiet” by Susan Cain, a lot about Jenn’s ‘9 Rules’ is more truth than whimsy.

You can click the link above for the full blog post; here I’m sharing an edited version.  These are probably good things to keep in mind as you get to know your neighbors, being mindful to respect that some Seattleites might ‘keep social’ differently than yourself.

Jenn Granneman’s: 9 Rules For Being Friends With An Introvert

  1. Don’t text us and ask us to be ready to hang out in 10 minutes.  We need waaaay more than 10 minutes to mentally prepare ourselves to be with people.
  2. If we hung out with you yesterday, we don’t want to hang out again today. No offense, but we need time to recharge after being with people.
  3. If we think it’s just going to be the two of us hanging out, don’t invite three more people. It’s a little hurtful when we feel like we’re just another warm body in your extrovert entourage.
  4. Don’t show up where we live without asking first.  This goes back to that whole “we need to be mentally prepared to see people” thing.
  5. “Tired” is code for “we don’t want to be around people anymore.”  We might just be “tired” of being surrounded by people.
  6. We like to listen because we’re good at it, but don’t take advantage of it. (Don’t) launch into a monologue that lasts 20 minutes – even we have our limits.
  7. If we don’t answer your text right away, it doesn’t mean we hate you, it just means we want to be left along for a while. For our own mental sanity, sometimes we need to completely disconnect from people in every way.
  8. If you call us, it better be because you’re bleeding or your cat died, or some other horrific emergency happened. Otherwise, don’t call us. We hate talking on the phone.
  9. If we say we want to stay home, we really do just want to stay home. So let us.


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One Response to Beware the Seattle Introvert

  1. Anonymous says:

    I resemble that remark! 🙂 Thanks for sharing this, Becky. From an introvert who’s learned to be extroverted when needed.


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